Why can’t I be anybodys first choice.
I want to matter.
I guess it’s too much to ask.
I’m trying this new thing, to speak my opinion & thoughts with people that matter to me. To confess my feelings. I guess it’s a good thing, because I’m one of those people who won’t say a thing and I’ll keep it to myself but after I’m complaining on how I should of said something. This is big because now there won’t be a “what if”. So far I’ve confessed to a guy, it didn’t go well but I wasn’t expecting much, first, I’m not the best looking. Second, I’m not his type and third, I’m pretty sure there’s another person in his mind.
And that’s how i end up asking myself why i can’t be anybodys first choice. After all it is what it is, and I am OKAY.
*blows kiss up to the sky (for the aliens)*
ugh i want to get really uncomfortably rich and then just. go around and anonymously donate huge amounts of money to people for things like HEY youre trying to move away from your abusive parents?? BAM 10 thousand mystery dollars oh whats that your dog needs surgery?? BAM paid for hey you cant afford to go to that con with your friends?? BAM better get your cosplay ready you fucking nerd